“Gleefully wacky and irreverent.”

–The New York Times

“Line by line, Mr. Rudnick may be the funniest writer for the stage in the United States today.”

–The New York Times

“Deeply funny musings and adventures elevate Paul Rudnick to the highest level of American comedy writing.”

–Steve Martin

“One of the funniest quip-meisters on the planet.”

–The New York Times

“Paul Rudnick is a champion of truth (and love and great wicked humor) whom we ignore at our peril.”

–David Sedaris

“Quips fall with the regularity of the autumn leaves.”

–Associated Press

February 25, 2015

February

31-photo-mood-usa-new-york-winter-city-town-beautiful-snow-2The benefits of a particularly vicious winter:

I can alternate my wardrobe of knitted wool hats.

Handsome wool scarves are pearls for men.

In New York, far more than crime or the economy or education, winter is the test of a Mayor. How quickly have the streets been plowed? Which neighborhoods have been ignored, due to vengeful agendas? Why can’t that layer of packed, implacable ice be dealt with? Has the sidewalk in front of Grace Mansion been cleared?

The only thing which causes neighbors to speak to each other in elevators: the cold.

My partner John has a particular hatred for certain local TV weathermen. John grows especially gleeful when these weatherpeople are wrong. John believes in a website called the Weather Underground, which he swears is far more accurate. For some reason, I associate the Weather Underground with that Silk Road bitcoin-based, drug trafficking site, whose founder was recently convicted of masterminding a criminal empire.

When the temperature remains above 20 degrees, this now feels balmy.

Ugly footwear is not only allowed, but essential.

I stare at  especially grimy corners sprouting especially forlorn trees, and try to picture that corner in springtime. This is how especially terrible poems get written.

Blognick