“One of the funniest quip-meisters on the planet.”

–The New York Times

October 12, 2014

Alternatives to Saying “Have a Nice Day”

goodday_561. “Have a blessed day, unless you’re an atheist, in which case please have another Godless, empty, inhuman day filled with nothing.”

2. “Have a nice day, or don’t, see if I care, I was just being mindlessly polite.”

3. “Have a nice day, yes, I am the kind of person who says, ‘Have a nice day.’ Fuck you.”

4. “Have a nice day, despite your hair.”

5. “Have a day filled with niceness, even overflowing with niceness, just jam-packed with niceness. Choke on niceness.”

6. “Have a nice day, but a terrible evening.”

7. “Have a nice day, by blinding yourself to the misery of others.”

8. “Have a nice day. Or I’ll kill you.”

 

I found the above image on Bing – isn’t it disturbing? It’s like a greeting card from Sylvia Plath.

Blognick