“Gleefully wacky and irreverent.”

–The New York Times

“Line by line, Mr. Rudnick may be the funniest writer for the stage in the United States today.”

–The New York Times

“Deeply funny musings and adventures elevate Paul Rudnick to the highest level of American comedy writing.”

–Steve Martin

“One of the funniest quip-meisters on the planet.”

–The New York Times

“Paul Rudnick is a champion of truth (and love and great wicked humor) whom we ignore at our peril.”

–David Sedaris

“Quips fall with the regularity of the autumn leaves.”

–Associated Press

October 12, 2014

Alternatives to Saying “Have a Nice Day”

goodday_561. “Have a blessed day, unless you’re an atheist, in which case please have another Godless, empty, inhuman day filled with nothing.”

2. “Have a nice day, or don’t, see if I care, I was just being mindlessly polite.”

3. “Have a nice day, yes, I am the kind of person who says, ‘Have a nice day.’ Fuck you.”

4. “Have a nice day, despite your hair.”

5. “Have a day filled with niceness, even overflowing with niceness, just jam-packed with niceness. Choke on niceness.”

6. “Have a nice day, but a terrible evening.”

7. “Have a nice day, by blinding yourself to the misery of others.”

8. “Have a nice day. Or I’ll kill you.”


I found the above image on Bing – isn’t it disturbing? It’s like a greeting card from Sylvia Plath.