“Gleefully wacky and irreverent.”

–The New York Times

“Line by line, Mr. Rudnick may be the funniest writer for the stage in the United States today.”

–The New York Times

“Deeply funny musings and adventures elevate Paul Rudnick to the highest level of American comedy writing.”

–Steve Martin

“One of the funniest quip-meisters on the planet.”

–The New York Times

“Paul Rudnick is a champion of truth (and love and great wicked humor) whom we ignore at our peril.”

–David Sedaris

“Quips fall with the regularity of the autumn leaves.”

–Associated Press

November 15, 2013

All Mine

I know that many people are wondering exactly who purchased that Francis Bacon portrait of Lucian Freud at a recent Christie’s auction, for a record $142,405,000. I’ll confess: it was me. But since the painting is actually a triptych, it’s a three-paintings-for-the-price-of-one bargain. I’m no fool. I still haven’t decided where I’m going to hang the paintings, so at the moment there’s one leaning against the wall in my foyer, another balanced atop a pile of books in my bedroom, and the third one’s still in the trunk of my car. All of the paintings have a sunny yellow backdrop, so I’m also thinking, wouldn’t they be cheerful summer place throw pillows. I also purchased the Jeff Koons’ Balloon Dog (Orange) for $58,405,000, but only because I needed a hostess gift.