I just passed a batch of 4 and 5-year-old kids, racing around a neighborhood playground. I overheard one of them tell the other, “I’m going to make you pay for that!” At first I thought they were playing, say, Batman and the Joker, but then I decided that, due to the first little boy’s powerful intonation, maybe they were playing Joan Crawford and Bette Davis.
I was once heading through my building’s hallway, when I interrupted some other children shooting each other with Nerf-ball guns. As I passed, they respectfully stepped back, but as the elevator doors were closing I heard these children shout, “Gay man! Gay man!” I instantly became politically outraged, until I realized that they were shouting, “Game on! Game on!”
I’ve just received an email from Jockey, advertising a 20%-off sale on Mothers Day gifts. At first I thought, who in their right mind would give their Mom underwear? But then I thought, well, Jockey also makes fancy underwear. Which made me think, who in their right mind would give their Mom fancy, sexy underwear? Why don’t they just call it the Norman Bates Collection?
