Ages 0-11: The world is such an interesting and constantly surprising place!
Ages 11-13: The world is changing all the time and I’m not sure I like it.
Ages 13-17: The world is a HORRIBLE place totally because of grown-ups who never listen to me which is why I won’t talk to them.
Ages 17-21: I am secretly SO HOT.
Ages 21-29: I can be anything I want if I just work hard and where are we going tonight?
Ages 30-35: I am a total failure and I always will be which is why no one will ever love me and can you blame them?
Ages 35-40: Okay, I can work with this, it’s not what I had in mind but it’s sort of better!
Ages 40-45: I still totally look like I’m 29.
Ages 45-50: Holding steady.
Ages 50-60: Am I over? Is feeling like this the definition of being an adult?
Ages 60-65: If I die now no one will say I died young but they’ll still say it was too soon.
Ages 65-70: I am almost old. Almost.
Ages 70-80: Why do all of these young people all look the same? Why can’t they wear name tags? What was I saying?
Ages 80-90: I know something you don’t know. Hee hee hee. And no, I don’t have Alzheimer’s, I just don’t remember you.
Ages 90-100: I’ll stand up soon. Or not.
Ages 100-???: I’m not talking to you unless you bring a camera crew, and a cake.
May 31, 2015
