“Gleefully wacky and irreverent.”

–The New York Times

“Line by line, Mr. Rudnick may be the funniest writer for the stage in the United States today.”

–The New York Times

“Deeply funny musings and adventures elevate Paul Rudnick to the highest level of American comedy writing.”

–Steve Martin

“One of the funniest quip-meisters on the planet.”

–The New York Times

“Paul Rudnick is a champion of truth (and love and great wicked humor) whom we ignore at our peril.”

–David Sedaris

“Quips fall with the regularity of the autumn leaves.”

–Associated Press

May 31, 2015


human agingAges 0-11: The world is such an interesting and constantly surprising place!
Ages 11-13: The world is changing all the time and I’m not sure I like it.
Ages 13-17: The world is a HORRIBLE place totally because of grown-ups who never listen to me which is why I won’t talk to them.
Ages 17-21: I am secretly SO HOT.
Ages 21-29: I can be anything I want if I just work hard and where are we going tonight?
Ages 30-35: I am a total failure and I always will be which is why no one will ever love me and can you blame them?
Ages 35-40: Okay, I can work with this, it’s not what I had in mind but it’s sort of better!
Ages 40-45: I still totally look like I’m 29.
Ages 45-50: Holding steady.
Ages 50-60: Am I over? Is feeling like this the definition of being an adult?
Ages 60-65: If I die now no one will say I died young but they’ll still say it was too soon.
Ages 65-70: I am almost old. Almost.
Ages 70-80: Why do all of these young people all look the same? Why can’t they wear name tags? What was I saying?
Ages 80-90: I know something you don’t know. Hee hee hee. And no, I don’t have Alzheimer’s, I just don’t remember you.
Ages 90-100: I’ll stand up soon. Or not.
Ages 100-???: I’m not talking to you unless you bring a camera crew, and a cake.