“Gleefully wacky and irreverent.”

–The New York Times

“Line by line, Mr. Rudnick may be the funniest writer for the stage in the United States today.”

–The New York Times

“Deeply funny musings and adventures elevate Paul Rudnick to the highest level of American comedy writing.”

–Steve Martin

“One of the funniest quip-meisters on the planet.”

–The New York Times

“Paul Rudnick is a champion of truth (and love and great wicked humor) whom we ignore at our peril.”

–David Sedaris

“Quips fall with the regularity of the autumn leaves.”

–Associated Press

March 28, 2014



I’m not sure why, but I can always find an exception to even the very best advice:

1. “Be yourself” – Would you say this to a serial killer?

2. “You can learn far more from failure than from success” – In my experience, at best, failure teaches you to make a different mistake the next time around.

3. “Write what you know” – Unless what you know isn’t all that captivating or original. As the actress Jeanne Moreau once said, “The ideas we can have about ourselves often aren’t very interesting.”

4. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” – So if I give a homeless person a million dollars, should I expect him to return the favor? How long should I wait? Maybe this should read “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, but don’t hold your breath.”

5. “All people are created equal” – Excuse me? Have you ever been in a lockerroom? Of course, all people should be treated equally, but that’s another story.

6. “Don’t judge a book by its cover” – But what if you’re judging a book cover contest? And as to appearances, as one actress once said to another, “Don’t be afraid of makeup.” To which the other actress, who’s a friend of mine, replied, “I’m wearing makeup.”

7. “On their deathbed no one ever wishes that they’d spent more time at the office” – But what if they loved working? What if their office had a really great couch? What if their family life was a living hell? I knew a woman who loved her career, and who was carried into the hospital clutching her phone list.